Cane

I keep a carbon fiber cane in my pannier. 

Watching the Tokyo Paralympics gave me a WTF reality check. So I need a cane to stabilize my wonky legs. So what? Is that all I have to complain about? Up until now I was embarrassed to pull the cane out of my pannier and have to use it. I don't give a shit anymore. I'm just being my best and enjoying life.  

So what gives?

I have nerve damage to my lower legs and feet caused by either years of back problems and back surgeries but more likely from bi-lateral hip replacements. The timeline suggests the butcher job the surgeon did on my hips not only caused nerve damage but also left me with a scared and chronically inflamed Piriformis muscles and sciatic nerve entanglement in the scar tissue. Also Heterotopic Ossification in my right hip (more here) and an uneven pelvis. 

Slowly over the years, after my hip replacements, my calves muscles (particularly the Gastrocnemius) have weaken to the point where I can't stand on my toes, My right leg is worse. The medial head of the  Gastrocnemius has totally atrophied. Try getting around with weak calve muscles. I feel like a drunken cow if I'm not using a cane. I would not pass a sobriety test walking a straight line. So I use a cane to stabilize my walking because my calves aren't helping much. 

When riding my trike clipping into my pedals helps to stabilize my calves but then I have to deal with lower leg numbness which starts in my feet. When I ride the more I climb and the longer I ride pressure builds on the small compromised Piriformis muscles that are adjacent to the sciatic nerve. And the lower leg numbness sets in and I have to take a short break and stretch. 

And I have some other minor nerve damage issues to my legs that are not worth complaining about. 

And to top it all off the weakness in my legs makes me prone to uncomfortable muscle tightening and occasional full blown cramps. A couple of small muscles in my right leg, the Gracilis (inner thigh) and the Tibialis (shin), are forced in some way to compensate for my wonky calves and they'll cramp if I get off the trike to fast or make sudden cycling movements after I've been riding for awhile. I just have to be aware of this and be careful. I can go for months without a cramp and then I eventually do something stupid like hurry off the trike after a long ride. 

I've kept my upper body strong so maybe time to add a handcycle to my cycling routine.

I'm done...time to look forward.